#430
oh my sky I feel like going to swim the weather is so hot.
woke up as usual around 7am (okay maybe not usual)... gosh the CNY holidays made me so lazy I think even though they're so far away already. being able to wake up at 8am on weekends is a luxury D: PFFT.
So, my last SLI is gone!
okay it's not like I have any emotions WHACKING me in the stomach or something, but goodness me, last SLI. Hmm idk if it's just me, but I think the feeling of being sec4 has finally kicked in. well maybe it's no longer only because the sec4s'09 aren't here anymore, maybe it's the feeling of having many more worries and many more instances of being upset and really just in despair. I just it's just another stage in life perhaps.
we had a rgco dialogue yesterday! thanks nanny and mich for that dialogue, it was... I guess.. rather useful in the sense that people got to speak up and say what they had to say about rgco for now, and i think it was really good "let-out-all-that-angst" time. I wanted to request for everybody to start shooting daggers at the SLs but in the end I decided against it because... well maybe we SLs wouldn't be able to take it hmm idk, but all it takes is ______ and i cannot tahan anymore. So i guess.. wise decision heh.
but i really want feedback ):
but rgco dialogue... okay nevermind I won't say anything else here.
we had huibao too! people whom I really wanted to have huibao didn't turn up for very amazing reasons, actually probably invalid reasons/ reasons they didn't bother to tell me at all until I ASKED, and i think you get the general idea that i'm pissed. YES I AM, so if you guys read this (which I don't think you will) please do reflect. A section is not made up of just you, you cannot be absent and be present as and when you please. Thanks.
huibao was okay i guess, in the sense that I got a clearer picture of where the section is now. It's not like we're extremely bad, because people who underperformed were very obviously shaking away (oops haha) and I actually heard some of them before. And people who didn't play mangchun kuaiban as fast as you normally do, BANG BANG BANG. you were supposed to xD BANG AGAIN.
ahwell back to rgco dialogue i guess. I realised how much some of my dear friends were suffering and all, and i guess i know more problems they face now. But it's just this general sense of helplessness because I know i can never be enough to help them, and at the moment it seems as though nothing i think of is good enough. And furthermore, i have my own load too, and thinking about 3 (?) persons' loads is just killing me.
but i want to help.
SO BADLY.
#429
hmm... today was uneventful except for fire drill :D
411 owns everyone seriously, we were like so enthu about the fire drill and we reached the field first okay. and then we made mr ng say "WELL DONE FOUR ELEVENNNN~" into the mike so everybody would turn and gaze at us in envy. and then we started singing "pass it on" (it only takes a SPARK to get the FIRE going) which was omg super amusing :D damn funny watching the ku1 xiao4 bu4 de2 faces of the tchers walking past our class HAHA omg 411 owns! and our neighbours (410 and 412) and many other classes started to look at us like we were Exhibit A in the ancient civilisation museum.
which made us feel rather proud :D
we are always proud of strange things, which is why i love us <3>
punching bag! omg i need a punching bag! (as in the real punchable type. but then again it might not work out after all because after punching my pillow/bed i apologise to them.)
#428
Once upon a time, in a little white fridge, there lived an apple and a banana. They were very different fruits. Banana crumbled easily under pressure. Apple only collapsed under very great pressure, and was incredibly obstinate.
Banana didn’t like Apple very much, and Apple didn’t like Banana very much. However, they decided that it was not very nice of them, and they tried to like their counterpart. It was no use, for eventually Apple thought Banana was too much of a softie, and Banana found Apple inflexible and stubborn. Apple also felt that Banana was too naïve, while Banana felt that Apple was too hypocritical.
One day, a new friend arrived in the fridge!
Orange arrived!
Orange was different.
Orange was relatively hardy, and collapsed only under an substantial amount of pressure. Both Apple and Banana liked Orange.
Orange was strong and extremely persevering. With a little proding, Orange would give his best. Orange was Orange, both inside and outside.
Orange could not understand why Apple was so stubborn, and why Banana was so overly vulnerable, but Orange still gave in and made friends with Apple and Banana.
One day, there was a fire. Orange immediately jumped off the fridge in search of a towel, but Apple pleaded with Orange for immediate help. Orange knew it was not the best choice, but Orange stayed behind, only to catch Banana, for Banana was very vulnerable. Apple had to push Banana down. However, instead of letting Banana fall, Apple fell with Banana, right onto Orange. Apple was so heavy that he crushed poor Banana, and Banana lost his life as a result. Orange suffered bruises, but nothing was worse than losing his friend.
The next few days passed in agony and remembrance of their lost friend.
This afternoon, Orange woke up from his nap sweating.
“FIRE! FIRE!” screamed Orange. Apple refused to budge. “it’s comfortable and snug in here, stop disturbing me!”
Orange knew he couldn’t wait. He grabbed Apple and jumped down most unfortunately straight into the fire, perishing although not smashed by the impact. While all these happened, Apple, bouncing off Orange’s hard back, promptly fell asleep once again.
Orange died as a result of his genuine love for his friend, and saved his friend due to his bravery.
Or, we could say, Orange died while being stubborn about saving his friend, and his love for his friend made him all the more vulnerable.
So in the end, the overly stubborn and the overly vulnerable was the Orange himself, he who was genuine, and he who died for a friend.
-The end-
#427
I'm sorry if this post sounds depressing.
(but something made me happy today, wls is back!!! ((: )
i have absolutely NO idea why, but sometimes i feel just like a floating feather in the air, something insignificant, something left alone and out of the way. and at the same time i also feel that i've been trying my best at so many things but no, nothing really is working out.
like, sometimes i find myself not being a good senior, my sec ones are so impressionable and yet i'm like what kind of sh*t and like wth, some people actually think i dislike them and all? argh idk what is going on but i have bloody tried my best. yes i have, and i don't konw what makes me fail when perseverance= 100%.
on a slightly happier note, congrats mr ng! :D (haha not my ft...)
whooo~
and crystal,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY (5MIN EARLY!) :DDDD I LOVE YOU MY EX-SEATMATE, BIO LAB PARTNER, AND AWESOMELY DEAR FRIEND (:
#426;
Sec1s came in yesterday.
Chengyin, jingyin, nicole, mary, yanling, huiling, huiqing, welcome to xianyue (:
to tiffy:
don't know if you'll see this, but i'm so ever grateful for having a batchmate like you who's willing to listen to my incessant ranting, yes, tyvm for listening. we'll work together yes (:
to vivian:
thanks so much for staying back to dig scores with me, though you totally could have gone home earlier (:
I was just complaining a whole load of sh*t to tiffy (and vivian who had to listen while trying to find scores xD) yesterday, about all the struggles and everything, and I'm so glad both of them are willing to listen to me even though I can get so irritating. But what I realised yesterday was how tiffy and I actually had quite similar thoughts... don't bother asking because I won't type it anywhere here NYEHNYEH.
I guess being a senior is overall really tough. Maybe it's really how the previous batches felt when they were passed the baton, but it sure isn't easy. There are so many things to consider, so many things to worry about, and even if you tell yourself to cut yourself some slack, all it takes is a small little trigger to make you start worrying all over again. It's a vicious cycle. Not trying to say that when you become a senior you should become worrisome, but I guess... let nature take its course.
I used to be naive, always thinking that others could feel the same as I do, others would have a conscience, others would care enough to do certain stuff instead of pretending the responsibility isn't theirs. I think 3 years are enough to tell me that I'm wrong, and leading others really isn't as simple as it seems. You might say "duh", but well it just seems so easy sometimes for people with the courage and the attitude. But no, it takes more than just that. Sometimes I feel that I have to be a superhuman, maybe it's because I care too much that I feel that way. Well, even if I care too much, it doesn't mean I'll stop caring so much from now on, because it's really really impossible for me due to the strong emotional attachment and all that memories that keep flooding back into my mind.
I really admire how jiahui, jasselyn and yifei used to do things. It all seemed so organised, so well-planned, so well done, and now, well, it's not that things are getting horrible and all but still. I really wish wls would come back like now, because once she's back almost everything is solved. really, everything and my worries would just diminish. They'd vanish one by one. BUT, that's if she returns soon ): I really miss wls, and it isn't only because I miss her being here to help whenever koshae and I and the section need help, it's also because she was really nice, and she's the only one who really really understands xianyue's situation. She'd know what to do, and she'd give the most appropriate advice. And now it's not like wangjinglaoshi or linlaoshi aren't nice. They're nice! but they don't understand our history. And they probably don't really know how much the sec4s worry after every xiaozu.
There are times that I wonder if I wanted too much at the start. There seems to be so many things on my plate now, it's getting into this situation of li4 bu4 cong2 xin1. I never ever 强求for anything, and I really appreciate all the chances given to me, but I'm the type that wants to do whatever I can, so it's really not a nice feeling when I want to something that I don't have the time to do. Not to mention Mr Homework is sitting on my table and being annoying. Huge, fat, lumpy, irritating Mr Homework. GRAWRS.
anyway.
well done chuida for longteng :D everyone looked really impressed okay, I'm so proud of all of you you gave me a pleasant surprise (: especially rei and ginteng, you guys OWN.
411 made cards for mr leeyangngtoh (: I think our class is really thoughtful sometimes, so sweet. we put mr ng's card on his car :D and passed mr lee his after celebs in the hall (he went:" IT'S PINK!!!!") and gave mr toh his during english. ms kum very kindly helped us put mr yang's on his table :D
I think our class decor totally pwns everyone else (maybe it might not be as pretty, but there was a lot put into it, and almost everything is made of recycled materials we're so cool right.) and even if we don't win it's okay we win in our hearts (:
chenyan's so funny!
"WE WIN! WE WIN!!!! -does a little dance-"
but thank you so much chenyan for all your effort (:
and of course, denise, for everything you've done (:
if anything, I'm grateful for this class, because it's really unlike any other class I've had. Something that happened today during math- it was probably such a small thing, but yvonne and I personally think it says something about us. Ms kum was letting us play the trigo game, and 2 groups didn't have their sets yet so everyone got a headstart and ms kum went down to get the other sets (3 fastest completers of the game get to eat twisties or cheezels omt hahaha whooo). Then shawna was like "eh don't start yet we don't have our sets!! eh UNFAIR!" (haha she was saying in this very amusing shawna voice!)
So I said: "can everyone like MASH up your trigo cards now, they don't have theirs yet leh!"
-411 mashes cards-
no complaints. Yvonne and I were like, -smile- (:
plus we wrote little cards for friends in the class- little vday notes! it was so sweet because at first there was only one box of cards and nobody was forced to write anything, but in the end 411 finished up 2 whole boxes of cards.
we are awesome yo.
sometimes it's things like this that cheer me up enough to face the rest of my reality.
do you know what it feels like
to be the last one to know that
the lock to the door has changed?
sometimes i miss how easy it used to be to complain to you guys.
tag replies:
(from very very long)
yue: yes i posted about chalet hahah (this is how long i haven't replied tags...) i know i'm awesome right!
xinyuan: so have you watched avatar? think you did (:
passerby: why so mysterious D:
yunan: wheeee boinggggboinggg thanks for the 7 (:
yvonne: i don't mind playing the elements song for y'all (:
wenyun: wheee hopefully jc is still treating you well (: see you soon yo!
yunan: i have become more OCD than you. I told mr toh his alignment of desks wasn't straight after he spent 5 minutes arranging them in line
viannnnn: WHEEEE WOMANNNN HAPPY CNY GET ANGBAO MANYMANY
WJ: yup mr toh is awesome! (:
zhengxi: heyhey! how's rj? (: hope you're doing well too!
passerby: yes i was at orchard road, how do you know O_O woah.
shengyi: hey hope you're alright.
crystal: hello awesome lab partner!! plasmid extraction FTW :D
LEEVOON NUMBER#2: hello there my clone (: I'm so proud of you, and the rest of chuida too! longteng was awesome :D
vian: what background from windows?
yue: yeshh i like hot milos!
chinhwee: hello senior!! how're you doing now? what plans? (:
rachel: yo fatimaria, thanks :D haha birthday post x)
crystal: yesh totally, but the wasabi was SHO CUTEE
xinyuan: wasabis look like.... wasabis.
huiyi: happy 3months minus 1 day early birthday!!! :D
rachel: hahaha why don't YOU have a blog!
yue: tagged back!!
xiaohan: haha thanks (: zouyin sometimes :/
shengyi: welcome (:
orangeglitter: hello (: haha who are you!
dengqing: thank you so much qingdeng <3>
yuqing: thank you dear batchie (: <3>
i'm done~!
#425
sometimes I'm pretty nasty hahaha.
Esther: I realised that too much work and too little time essentially translates to A LOT OF POWER!
Me: but that's work DONE.
Esther: -inner struggle not to punch me-
(haha this is what I'd expect of esther considering I was so mean :D)
anyway. weekends suck big time, gone are the days I used to be able to go out on weekends, out meaning further than the market near my house for breakfast, out meaning a few hours spent in a leisurely manner-
now the no life person typing this spends her weekends chionging homework.
ack.
alright I really shouldn't be complaining considering some people have much more rubbish to deal with :/ truckloads of sh*t ._.
rawrr but I wish for a better life. what ever happened to my new year resolutions!
manz february already, and we're towards MID-feb. what does that say? 9 months till out of rgs?
haha I want to cry.
#423
omgosh somebody tell me how lousy my molihua solo sounds ://
argh I hope everything will get straightened out soon omgosh. URGH.
to some special people:
get well soon! D: