#404;
I guess the sec4s are still having a whale of a time in fam now hahaha, cool lah everyone turns into a woman today -.- okay not like they weren't women but, AIYAH YOU GEDDIT RIGHT.
tomorrow's rgco farewell.
i'm having an entirely different feeling from last year's farewell. and, i know why.
of course, you would say, next year i'd be sec4, that's why feeling different! DUH! but i don't know, it's a weird sort of different. a sort of .. not knowing what is to come, or insecurity, or haven't-sunk-in-yet kind of different; it somehow doesn't HIT ME WITH THE FULL BLOW, that next year, my batch wouldn't have any safety nets anymore.
i think, maybe, that realisation is to be saved for tomorrow.
on a side note, i am very proud of my little sec one juniors because all it took was a single email, and everyone, everyone, everyone came for sectional lunch (: every single one of them omg, i wasn't expecting full attendance!! i love you guys man (:
and jiayou to all taking kaoji, haha even though the number of people taking kaoji kind of diminished (coughcough), i'm still gonna make sure you guys can play for huibao >D EAGER ANTICIPATION YEAH? >D -insert evil cackling-
back to farewell...
i still haven't finished my farewell notes, in fact i've only written 2. i'll finish them tomorrow by hook or by crook. and i owe shiyun moeco scores which i'll photocopy tmr too xD oh and thanks for the photocopy card shiyun! :D i'll use it to photocopy your beloved scores haha.
i must say, i've kind of been forced to get used to pracs without sec4s, and even though pracs now aren't all that bad, i really miss the days when all i had to worry about was how to improve my playing. it feels great contributing to a group of people i love of course, but i guess there's a reason why everyone occasionally wishes to return to innocence? haha if you're expecting a paragraph-long ranting about my problems then uh sorry i'll have to disappoint you xD WHOOPS. i can say that it gets tiring at times, maybe a happy sort of tired, a disappointed sort of tired, but my emotions after xiaozu/dazu are actually dictated by me...
i've decided that my rgco life is like an upright curve, though there's an extremely low point, the number of high points is greater, and though rgco brings me many tears and fears, sometimes more tears than laughter, i still think (and will always believe) that the tears are worth it. and it's always good to be a rubber ball, bouncing up after every low. i will learn.
after all, there are such things called happy tears. (:
AND POHGINTENG, I WILL NOT LOSE MY BET (: